Every job has its pressures. Tight deadlines, difficult conversations, critical incidents, and emotionally demanding situations can all take a toll on our wellbeing. While many people are resilient and capable of managing occasional stress, the impact of challenging work can build up over time. That’s why regular check-ins with ourselves and each other are so important.
A simple conversation after a difficult day, project, or incident can provide valuable support, strengthen team connections, and help prevent stress from becoming something more significant.
Understanding Cumulative Stress
When people think about stress, they often focus on major events or crises. However, wellbeing is often affected not by a single incident, but by the accumulation of many small pressures over time.
Cumulative stress can develop when people are exposed to ongoing demands without sufficient opportunities to recover. This might include managing high workloads, supporting distressed clients, responding to challenging situations, dealing with conflict, or balancing competing priorities.
The signs can be subtle at first and may include:
- Increased irritability or frustration
- Difficulty concentrating
- Feeling emotionally drained
- Changes in sleep or energy levels
- Reduced motivation or engagement
- Withdrawing from colleagues or social activities
Recognising these signs early allows people to take proactive steps to look after their wellbeing before stress becomes overwhelming.
The Importance of Checking In
After a challenging piece of work or a difficult incident, it can be tempting to move straight on to the next task. However, taking a moment to pause and check in can make a significant difference.
Checking in doesn’t need to be formal or time-consuming. It may be as simple as:
- “How are you feeling after that?”
- “That was a tough situation—how are you travelling?”
- “Is there anything you need before we move on?”
- “Want to grab a coffee and debrief?”
These conversations communicate care and provide an opportunity for people to reflect on their experience, process their thoughts, and identify whether additional support may be helpful.
Supporting Colleagues After Difficult Incidents
You don’t need to be a mental health expert to support a colleague. Often, the most valuable thing you can offer is your presence and willingness to listen.
When checking in with someone after a challenging event:
- Create space for them to talk if they want to.
- Listen without judgement or interruption.
- Avoid rushing to solve the problem.
- Acknowledge that the experience may have been difficult.
- Encourage them to access additional support if needed.
It’s also important to remember that people respond differently to challenging situations. Some may want to talk immediately, while others may need time to process before they’re ready to discuss what happened. Respecting individual preferences is an important part of providing effective support.
The Value of Informal Peer Conversations
Some of the most meaningful support in the workplace comes from colleagues who simply take the time to check in.
Informal conversations can:
- Reduce feelings of isolation
- Normalise discussions about wellbeing
- Strengthen workplace relationships
- Help people feel seen and supported
- Encourage early help-seeking when needed
These conversations don’t need to happen in a meeting room or follow a particular structure. They might occur during a coffee break, while walking between meetings, after a shift, or during a quick phone call.
What matters most is the genuine interest and care behind the conversation.
Looking After Ourselves and Each Other
Building a supportive workplace culture is everyone’s responsibility. While organisations play an important role in providing wellbeing resources and support services, everyday interactions between colleagues can have a powerful impact.
Taking a few minutes to check in after a challenging piece of work may seem like a small gesture, but it can help people feel connected, valued, and supported. Over time, these conversations contribute to healthier teams, stronger relationships, and a workplace culture where people know they don’t have to navigate difficult experiences alone.
