This article was adapted from Adam Grant’s There’s a Name for the Blah You’re Feeling article published by the New York Times
What is Languishing?
Mental health is often considered to exist on a spectrum of depression to flourishing. Depression is the troughs of mental illness; you feel worthless, drained, and hopeless. Flourishing is the height of well-being; you have a strong sense of purpose, pleasure, and connection. Languishing is the foreign middle ground; you don’t feel hopeless but you’re not full of joy either. Languishing leaves you feeling aimless; you may be struggling to focus on your work or have lost motivation altogether. You feel indifferent to things that normally bring you joy and experience a decrease in your productivity. Languishing is an incredibly common experience and left untreated can put you at risk of developing depression or anxiety in the future, so it’s important to be able to recognise the symptoms in both yourself and others.
What caused my Languishing?
In the early days of the pandemic, the constant uncertainty and fear of the unknown had your brain in fight or flight mode. As the pandemic dragged on, so too did your heightened state of emotion, and this may have developed into a chronic state of languishing.
What steps can I take to eliminate my languishing?
Name the thing.
One of the best ways to manage emotions is to name them. Doing this can give an unfamiliar and scary experience familiar vocabulary. This can help us to understand the emotions we’re experiencing and relate them to previous experiences. It could help provide a clearer insight into your feelings, and most importantly, remind us that we’re not alone; languishing is a shared experience.
When someone asks you how you’re doing, answer them honestly. Instead of “I’m fine!” try; “Actually, I’m really languishing at the moment.” The clarity this can provide you makes your experience real and communicable, and may help friends and family recognise and understand their own feelings of despondency.
Flow
Flow is the state of absorption we feel when completing a meaningful challenge or task. It is the feeling of deep satisfaction from immersing yourself in projects where your sense of time and self fades away. This could be something as simple as completing a cross word puzzle each morning, investing in a small creative project (I’ve taken up knitting!) or even emotionally investing in a new Netflix show.
Keep it contained at first; small wins that feel manageable and give you a rush of triumph (like a crossword puzzle) can lead to bigger challenges that stretch your skill. Psychologist Adam Grant says that the key to flow is just-manageable-difficulty; The task should be completable, but also engaging and stimulating.
Uninterrupted Time
This means setting strong boundaries with yourself. Turn off your phone an hour each morning. Take away constant distractions and allow yourself your full focus. A sense of progress is a major factor in achieving daily joy and motivation. Can you stretch your uninterrupted time to two hours? Three? Treat these blocks of time as treasures.
Not being depressed doesn’t mean that you aren’t struggling. Not being burnt out doesn’t mean that you’re full of energy and raring to go. Acknowledging languishing can be a big step in the road to achieving pre-pandemic happiness and motivation.
